The couple with their parents, Bernadette, carrying her little granddaughter, and Gratien, on the right.
Bernadette Mukakabera is the protagonist of a story that is no doubt the least curious. Not only he forgave the man who killed his wife 28 years ago during the Rwandan genocide, but also gave a go-ahead for his son married the murderer’s daughter.
Women are the face of the Catholic Church in the African nation in its attempt to reconcile a society that has been severely affected both economically and socially. In the mid -1990s, Rwanda experienced one of the greatest exterminations in the history of the continent.
The Rwandan genocide (1994) was an attempt to exterminate the Tutsi population by the hegemonic Hutu government. The massacre lasted 100 days, in which 1,000,000 people were killed, equivalent to 70% of the population at the time.
In 1994, the Hutus began the process of mass extermination against the Tutsi population in Rwanda.
Rwanda during the war
Bernadette Mukakabera, with her husband Kabera Vedaste, They were part of the Tutsis, the community was persecuted after they shot down the plane on which the president of Rwanda, from the Hutu tribe, was traveling on April 6, 1994. This started the massacre between Rwandans of the same ethnic group.
Soon, thousands of armed men took to the streets to attack one another and start a civil war. The Hutu persecuted and exterminated almost all Tutsi in the country.
After that 100 deadly days for the African nation came the consequences: a group of Tutsi rebels took power and thousands of people were sentenced for the aberrations committed.
In Rwanda, community courts known as “gacaca” were created to deal with genocide suspects. Photo: BBC.
The courts of participatory justice gacaca they helped communities deal with genocide. At these weekly hearings, clans were given the opportunity to confront the accused, listen and present evidence about what really happened and how the events happened.
Love is stronger
One of the courts is Thanks Nyaminani, who lives with her family next to Bernadette’s house in Mushaka, western Rwanda. They both worked on the farm.
Gratien, in 2004, told Bernadette how she killed her husband and apologized. At that same hearing, he decided to hide all the pain behind him and forgive her. Therefore, he does not have to serve a sentence of 19 years in prison but a sentence of 2 years of community service.
The man spent 10 years in prison before his public apology and during all that time the Gratien family tried to reconcile with Bernadette and her son Alfred, who was only 14 years old when his father was killed. .
Alfred and Yankurije were married 14 years after the genocide.
son of Nyaminani, Yankurije Donatabegan going to Bernadette’s house to help with the day-to-day work: “I decided to go and help Alfred’s mother with the housework and even on the farm, because she had no one else to help her, considering that. my father was responsible for the murder of his wife”, He told the BBC.
It was at that moment when Alfred met the girl and a few years later they began to fall in love quite difficult to expose. Bernadette was touched by his consideration: “I loved his heart and his conduct, so I could not prevent him from being my son’s wife.”
But for Gratien it was not that simple. When told about the marriage proposal, she couldn’t believe it. She repeatedly wondered why a family would want her to hurt her daughter so much.
The families of Yankurije and her mother-in-law, Bernadette, have a close relationship and are bound together by love. Photo: BBC.
Bernadette, speaking to the BBC, explained: “Our children had nothing to do with what happened. They just love each other and nothing should stop people from loving each other. “
After Bernadette Mukakabera’s insistence and her definite forgiveness, they were able to convince her to give a go-ahead and the wedding would take place. The couple married in the local Catholic church in 2008. Here Gratien confessed to the congregation, after his community service two years ago, and apologized.
an inspiring story
The church has spearheaded efforts to reunite communities in the area. Padre Ngoboka Theogene said that the people of Rwanda have embraced the reconciliation program. The churches know that people have no choice but to live together, so it is better to do it in peace and understanding.
The final takes place in front of the town, where the victim and the perpetrator stand next to each other: “The victim extended his hand to the accused as a sign of forgiveness,” Ngoboka said in a BBC interview. .
Recently – shortly after Gratien’s death – many people attended an event in Mushaka for the 28th anniversary of the genocide. On this event Bernadette spoke about her son’s marriage to the son of the murderer of her husband.
Most of Rwanda’s population, over 12 million, practices Christianity.
The woman hopes that Alfred and Yankurije’s love story has inspired many more to ask for and offer forgiveness.
Source: Clarin
